Okay, so I’ve been backed up for like, three days. Seriously uncomfortable. I tried everything – prunes, tons of water, even those nasty fiber drinks. Nothing. Then, I stumbled across some random forum thread where people were joking about, well, you know, helping with constipation. I figured, “What do I have to lose?”
The Experiment Begins
So, yeah, I decided to give it a shot. I mean, I was desperate. I put on some music, got myself in the mood, and, uh, got to work. It wasn’t like I was thinking about the constipation the whole time, obviously. Just focused on, um, the task at hand.
The Build-Up
- Phase 1: The usual warm-up. Nothing to report here, just getting things going.
- Phase 2: Getting more intense. Still no, uh, rumblings downstairs. Still focused on other thing.
- Phase 3: Okay, nearing the, ahem, climax. Started feeling a little… different. Like, maybe something was shifting down there. A little tingle.
The Moment of Truth
And then… BAM! I, uh, finished. And almost immediately after, I felt this HUGE urge. Like, I had to GO. I rushed to the bathroom, and… let’s just say it was a success. A major success. I’m not kidding, it was like a dam bursting. I felt ten pounds lighter.
The Aftermath
I sat there for a minute, kind of stunned. Could it really be that simple? All this time, all those laxatives, and the answer was… that? I felt a little silly, but mostly just relieved. I cleaned myself up, washed my hands(very importent!), and walked out feeling like a new man.
I’m not saying this is a guaranteed cure for everyone. I’m no doctor. But for me, in this one specific instance, it worked. And hey, if you’re really desperate, and you’ve tried everything else… maybe it’s worth a shot? Just, you know, be prepared for a potentially very effective outcome. And maybe don’t tell your doctor I told you to do this.
