So, today, let’s talk about this thing that’s been bugging me for a while now. It’s like, I’ve been feeling like a total failure at life, you know? Like, I suck at everything. It’s a shitty feeling, and I figured, why not share my messed-up journey and maybe, just maybe, someone out there can relate or get a laugh out of my misery.
It all started when I woke up one morning and realized I was in a rut. Like, a deep, dark, “I suck at life” kind of rut. I started listing all the things I was failing at, and boy, was that a long list. Work, relationships, even my pathetic attempts at hobbies – I was bombing everywhere.
First thing I did was try to figure out what I could do differently. I mean, I couldn’t just sit around and wallow in self-pity, right? So, I thought about what I could do with some support. Like, maybe I needed a helping hand or something. I started reaching out to friends, family, anyone who would listen to my sorry ass.
Then, it hit me – maybe it was a medical thing. So I went to see a doctor. Turns out, I wasn’t dying, just seriously messed up in the head. The doc suggested some lifestyle changes, you know, the usual eat-healthy, exercise-more bullshit. I tried, I really did, but it’s hard to change your life when you feel like you’re destined to fail.
But here’s the kicker – loneliness. Man, that’s a bitch. I felt so alone in my suckiness. Like, nobody understood what it was like to be me, a professional failure. I googled “how to not feel lonely when you’re a loser,” and guess what? A bunch of articles about how I’m not alone popped up. Go figure.
I even looked up some “You are not alone” quotes, and some of them actually made me feel a tiny bit better. It’s like, knowing that other people have felt this way too makes it a little less shitty. I mean, misery loves company, right? And, I don’t wanna go on a wild goose chase, but I knew there was something else out there for me. I started to think about what I really wanted. I decided that I would do it. But I just don’t know how. Or when I’d have time for it. So that’s something I gotta think about still, I guess.
And here’s a thought – maybe loneliness is just temporary. Like, maybe I won’t suck forever. Maybe one day I’ll wake up and be good at something. Or at least, not suck as much. That’s the hope, anyway. It’s tough, though. Every day feels like a struggle. But I’m trying, damn it. I’m trying to not feel like a complete waste of space.
So, that’s my story. A story of a guy who feels like he sucks at life, trying to figure it all out. It’s messy, it’s real, and it’s definitely not pretty. But hey, it’s my life, and I’m sharing it. Maybe it’ll help someone, maybe it won’t. But at least I’m putting it out there, into the void, hoping for something to change.
And if I am being honest with myself, I do like my alone time and when I am alone I do work on myself, my projects, my thoughts. I started to feel better when I realized I’m not lonely, I just like being alone. It’s different, right?
Anyway, to all those people who feel they suck at life, trust me, you are not alone. We all are just running our own race, at our own pace. Nothing wrong with that.
